I keep playing near the fire, thinking this one will be different. But every time I think that this time maybe, just maybe, I won't. I always do. I want to douse the fire, never to look back at it again, but I know I won't. Every time I swear this is it, there's no hope left, no one for me out there. But, I still have one little bit of hope left. I feel like the empress at the end of The Neverending Story. I hold that one little glimmer in my hand, but there is no Bastian to make my world whole again.
Love is a cruel joke that the universe plays on us. I don't know that I believe there is such a thing. I've never seen true love work out for anyone close to me except my brother. Why should I think that I'm any different than the other women in my life? I'm doomed to be like them, alone or miserable. Life has proven this to me.
1 comment:
I couldn't agree more with your blog Angela. I am just like you. I get close to that fire and pray that it doesn't burn me but it always does. I always have that faith that things will be different but they aren't. It's so hard. Love isn't easy. You can't change peoples minds and make them feel or think what you want them to. Oh and people say things and really don't mean them. It's heart breaking. I somehow keep hanging on myself. I wish i were smarter sometimes. Chin up!! You can join me and heather and all of our cats and when they die they can eat our corpses hahaha. I love you! Meghan
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